In the Bible's definition of love it states love is kind (1 Corinthians 13:4 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." NIV
Yet over and over I see people who are not being kind to those they say they love.
Too many times harsh words wit a harsh tone are used when they don't need to be. When you start out harshly the other person normally reacts by being hurt or defensive. For example, when you are upset with someone instead of saying "You stupid @#$%^&* you never can do anything right" you could try saying "When you forget to ______ it upsets me and we need to find a way to help you remember in the future". This communicates your feelings while letting others know something is bothering you. This approach then can move on to problem solving rather than blaming.
Failing to be kind breaks down relationships and can lead to hostility. When we are kind and look for the good in others we feel better about them and ourselves. By showing kindness the mood of your home, workplace, school, etc. can become more positive and relationships are strengthened.
I am a Licensed Professional Counselor and a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. I will be happy to respond to your relationship questions online through my blog. I provide personal coaching for people interested in improving their relationships. The coaching can be done in person at my office in Independence, MO or by phone. Email me at mark@independencecounselor.com for more information.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
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